The Neverending Experiment) Finding Your Voice as a Writer
The idiolect behind your idiosyncrasy
“Find Your Voice,” they say…
If I had a dollar for every time they said it without explaining what that means or how to do it, I’d be writing this from my billionaire mansion right now and not paying taxes.
Too soon, sorry. 😬
Finding your voice is serious business.
In my opinion, it’s the one thing we all have that sets us apart from other writers, from AI, from everyone else on the internet and planet. Our voice, our personality, our imprint, they’re like a fingerprint. People might have similar ones, but no one else can quite unlock your MacBook with it like you can.
A lot of my work as a small business copywriter is to help people find their voice (spoiler alert: it’s not missing, they already have it, we just bring it to LIFE). I show them how to use it cohesively throughout their website copy, social media marketing, podcasts, and beyond!
“You don’t need to find your voice. You have a voice. You just need to stop worrying about what other people think when you use it.” - Alyssa Nobriga
Easier said than done, I know!
I’ve gone (and am going) through my own discovery process of finding my voice, for my own writing too.
I believe the importance of “finding your voice” is immense:
It’s allowing yourself permission to show up as YOU. The one and only true-blue, authentic you.
When you find your own voice, you connect more deeply with those meant to be reading your words. You connect more deeply with your own words. And, you give others permission to show up too!
What does it mean then… to “find your voice” as a writer? I thought I’d share some actionable ways to start digging it up that have helped me. Fun, right!?
Before we begin, let’s word nerd it out with some definitions…
Voice is defined as: an individual’s distinctive style of expression, particularly in writing or creative work.
Voice is an interweaving of:
Your vocabulary - the words you choose to use and not use (ie. why didn’t I say “combination” instead of “interweaving?”?)
Your tone - the attitude, mood, and intention behind your words (sassy, snarky, gentle and babbly like a brook, powerful and bold, motivational)
Your pacing - this is about sentence length and punctuation. Otherwise known as: How. I. String. It. Together. To. Make your brain do what I want it to do as you’re reading along sing-song-a-ling-long. You follow?
Here’s another interesting factoid…
While dialect, culture, family history, and native language all play a role in how you use your voice, no one sounds exactly like you do.
You have your very own idiolect: Your completely unique use of language, vocabulary, grammar, pronunciation, idioms, the whole gamut!
You have your own personal language being built on a foundation of: experience, what you’ve consumed, who you’ve surrounded yourself with, what’s going on in that beautiful brain of yours, and I imagine even the grilled cheese you ate the other day is somehow affecting it too.
Your idiolect is your advantage as a writer/speaker/podcaster/human.
I don’t care for all the tidy little boxes people try to put our voices and personalities in. They can leave us confused and feeling out of place. Because yes, the shoe sort of fits… but not perfectly. Never mind the boxes other people try to put you in! Don’t even get me started.
That all said, there are common categories and patterns that people tend to fall into. A writer I follow, Justin Blackman, puts them into 9 distinct voice types. The Enneagram offers 9 different personality types, and there are, of course, other frameworks out there that coincide with real, live people you’ll encounter in the wild.
When I write for clients, I have a knack for pulling these threads out intuitively. But, I took Justin’s course in hopes of getting BETTER. And then, don’t you know… I started overthinking and second-guessing… everything. Including my own voice! 😬
The course was helpful, mind you. I love having tangible and strategic tools to back up what I do naturally. For a hot second though, it took me off-course. Instead of listening to the heartbeat of someone’s message, looking at the imprint of their lives, I could see myself trying to put people into boxes based on sentence structure and vocabulary choices.
As I navigated my way slowly (and painfully) back, I learned a thing or two about connecting to my own voice, once again, in the process.
Write like no one is watching.
Before polishing everything up or bringing your work to completion, write raw. Journal it out first, get down and dirty with it, rant, draft it in your Notes app, hash it out unfiltered. That’s where your voice starts to whisper back to life.
Say it out loud.
The jury goes both ways on this but I’m a fan of writing conversationally and as close to how I speak as possible. I don’t want you just reading my words, I want you hearing my voice in your head while you’re reading. Creepy, I know. But that’s my #1 goal in life. Your rhythm, tone, phrases, pronunciation, and pacing poke through in how you speak. Far more naturally than when you’re staring down a blinking cursor.
Know the rules. Break the rules.
Sorry, Mrs. Lebaron (my HS English teacher). I’m currently reading Barbara Kingsolver’s book, Demon Copperhead which I highly recommend for about 10,000 reasons. It’s a great depiction of how a character’s voice is brought out broken rule of grammar after broken rule of grammar. You feel like you’re in the brain of this boy throughout his life because of how she just went ahead and snapped all the rules in half. Know the rules of good writing and don’t be afraid to make them your own.
Try on voices for size.
Please note, I’m not saying COPY someone. You will go through phases, try out different voice costumes, experiment, grow! Your voice is ever-evolving if you are. You can try on different styles and voices for size, you can try them on in different places and spaces (ie. I don’t write like this on LinkedIn, folks!). When you start feeling your butt clench, or you’re repeating someone else’s voice, or for whatever reason, it’s just not quite YOU, try a different approach. Your voice can and will change as you grow. Your voice will be a little different depending on where you’re sharing. The only goal is that you sink into being 100% unmistakably YOU, whatever that looks like NOW.
Read! Listen to podcasts, watch shows, peruse art, go buy clothes…live.
The more creativity you soak in from other avenues in life, the more you start discovering who you ARE, who you’ve always been, who you’re becoming, who you no longer want to be.
Take note of:
Phrases you love
Words you can’t stand
Pacing that bores you to tears
Pet peeves that get you ranty
Threads and commonalities that give you the chills
A few other ideas:
Don’t stop there. Ask friends and family, find out how others perceive you, what’s their impression of your voice?
Write down your values and allow yourself to write through those as your inroad.
Pick up a rant and run with it and then… share it!
Write from different perspectives (what are your slippers thinking right now??).
Have FUN with the exploration process and don’t get all up in your head, finding your voice is an experiment in self-discovery that’s unfolding as you go.
I’ll leave you with these final questions to start exploring…
Tone
Are you more casual or formal? Warmer or more authoritative? Encouraging or challenging? Conversational or poetic?
Word Choices
Do you say folks? Y’all? Everyone? People? Do you like vivid verbs or everyday lingo? Are you sweary, slangy, clinical, or clever in your word choices?
Perspective
Do you like to challenge norms and beliefs? Do you ask deep questions? Do you keep it light and positive -always coming back to joy!? Are you all about justice, efficiency, creativity, and humanness? What’s the hill you’re willing to die on, and what soapboxes do you step onto most often?
Sentence Structure
Short? Longggggggggggggg and winding? Do you favor repetition? Do you like them em dashes…. ellipses….. (are you always using parentheses?). Asking rhetorical questions? Do you write like you talk or would it be Mrs. Lebaron-approved? What cadence are you setting?
These are small little things to focus on as you let that sweet sweet voice shine!
"In a world full of echoes, your original voice is your biggest asset." -Unknown
A little outside our norm, I know
Which is why today, and always, I’d love to know what you think! This is a conversation. What else do you want to know? Where are you experimenting with YOUR voice?
Absolutely loved this post! And I understand how trying to analyze one's voice can often through you out of its authenticity. I'm currently working on a novel where the protagonist speaks/thinks a lot differently than I do. I tend to journal in long, meandering sentences with a philosophical tone that tends towards growth and hope. My character is more clipped, being pulled off track and trying to avoid the harder questions.
It's been a challenge, but also really fun. I usually end up writing a scene as I see it unfolding, then go back and adjust it a bit so it fits more of her attitudes and viewpoints. It's an ever-evolving process. And I don't think it's one that's just for writers.
As human beings, I think we're all constantly trying to find our voice...from timid teenagers, or young adults making our way into the world, to more mature adults who finally decide F-it, I'm saying what I think (and people can love it or leave it). The most important thing is to never stop trying to know and express who you are.
I meant to comment on this earlier. I'm going to grab my journal and go through the points you made here. They are definitely worth reflecting on and paying attention to. It's definitely something you have to be intentional about!